Lady: “Kids, the building is closing in five minutes.”
Me: “Oh, dear!”
Dan: “We can’t stay over?!”
Lady: “You could…plenty to read. Nothin’ to eat, though.”
Dan: “KNOWLEDGE WILL BE OUR FOOD!”
Me: “By which he means…we’ll eat the books.”
Lady: *clears throat* “Um, so, the building is closing in five minutes.”
Dan: “Actually, we have a book signing scheduled in five minutes! We’re signing books!”
Me: “Not our books, though…we don’t have a book.”
Dan: “No, we only sign other people’s books.”
Me: “But we’re really good at it!”
Lady: “So, the building is closing…”
And by “fly around,” I don’t mean “get passed around.” I mean, actually fly around. Sometimes you just need to hurl foodstuffs to show your love.
But if you’re going to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day with a fiery food fight, you may as well have a half-wheat fiery food fight.
The half-wheat status enables you to eat this alongside a chilled glass of homemade, non-dairy Irish Cream. What’s that? You thought it was half-wheat for better health so you could die thin and perfectly preserved? AHAHAHA no. It’s so you can have as much fun as possible without dying before you’re done having said fun. The end.
So the building is closing in five minutes. Arm yourself for the night ahead. With cake.
Half-Wheat Irish Apple Snack Cake
5 green apples (I used Granny Smith)–use organic so you can leave the peel on
1/2 cup plus 2 Tablespoons wheat flour
1/2 cup plus 2 Tablespoons white flour
1/2 cup raw sugar
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 1/2 teaspoons Saigon Cinnamon
1/4 tsp freshly grated nutmeg
1/2 cup mild-flavored oil, like sunflower seed oil
1/4 cup whole milk yogurt (or 1 teaspoon lemon juice mixed with 3 Tablespoons plus 2 teaspoons nondairy (or dairy) milk)
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/3 cup sugar
1/4 cup flour
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1 pinch salt
1/4 cup cold butter, cut into chunks
Optional: powdered sugar for serving
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees and grease up an 8 x 8 square glass baking dish.
Cut the apples into relatively thin slices. In a large bowl, beat together the oil and raw sugar for a minute.
Beat in the eggs, vanilla, and yogurt until thoroughly combined.
Now toss in both flours, the baking powder, salt, nutmeg, and cinnamon, and stir just until it’s all mixed and moistened–don’t beat it to death.
Spread half the batter in the bottom of the baking dish, and top with half the apple slices–overlap the slices slightly. Now pour on the rest of the batter and top with the rest of the apple slices, overlapping them again.
In a small bowl, stir together all topping ingredients except butter. Using a fork or your fingers, rub the butter into the topping ingredients until you have a coarse, chunky crumble.
Sprinkle the crumble over the top of the cake.
Bake until topping is golden, and cake is lightly browned and just barely passes the toothpick test, about 40 minutes.
Let cool in the pan, and cut into squares to serve. If desired, sprinkle each square with powdered sugar before eating.
© 2012, Genevieve P. Charet. All rights reserved.Pin It